This is when I hit rock bottom – Cat’s Story
This is when I hit rock bottom – Cat’s Story
I was asked a question a few days ago and it has taken me a few days to come up with the answer but I figured it was better to sit and think about it then just say something on the spot.
Why do you go to the gym so much? How does someone answer that? I could have said that I love the gym and I go there to stay healthy, but if that was my answer then why did it take me so long to go? Why did I chose to sit on my couch, eat unhealthy food, and make thousands of excuses?
So after many days of thinking I have figured it out…. I started to go to the gym to figure out who I was.
I have been battling weight gain and weight loss for years and I have always been the big girl, but because I am tall I was holding the weight better. I started to accept the fact that I was who I was and that no matter what, I was going to be this person forever….. so I thought.
Like every morning I got up to get ready for work, went to get dressed and realized that my clothes no longer fit. I had nothing to wear so how was I supposed to go to work? I am not proud, but I called in for I had nothing to wear. This is when I hit rock bottom. I was wearing size 24 plus size jeans and they were too tight. I sat on my couch that day and cried the entire time.
That weekend my husband went to check out a gym that was holding a 4 week beginner class for Kettlebells and he came home and said we should go back together to meet the owner. I was hesitant for who wants to walk into a gym when they look like I did. I held my breath and walked down the scariest flight of stairs and met with the owner. We signed up for the class and that was the beginning.
After the 4 weeks I was asked to sign up for this Transformation program that the gym called the Little Black Dress – it was a weight loss program, so I thought I will try to see what happens. I went to the first class and looked around and what did I see? A group of women that were in great shape, what did I see when I looked in the mirror a very large girl who was in her own eyes fat, ugly, sad and lost.
Why did I let myself go for so long?
I used to be athletic, I used to be in shape, I used to be happy! See that’s the thing nobody tells you, if you are not happy with yourself you become lost and you pretend to be someone and something that you are not.
I did my first attempt at the workout which was 1 sit up and a lot of tears…. that’s right I cried the entire workout but pretended everything was great.
I went to the classes twice a week and did my very best in each class…. the funniest thing is that I started to get better at the workouts and started to loose weight. My clothes started to get too big and I started to feel better.
I know what many of you are thinking? Big girl goes to the gym, loses weight and becomes a new person? And lives happily ever after.
I still struggle with my weight daily, I still look in the mirror and see the old me, I still cry after some workouts when I get home only because I feel like everyone else is getting them and I am struggling with them….
This time I have support, I have a group of coaches and friends that have become my family that face these struggles with me head on.
So why do I go to the gym so often you ask? Because when I am there I know who I am and I know where I belong! I am changing everyday, I am challenging myself with every workout that I do. I am a women over the age of 40 that does weight lifting, Kettlebell training, and cardio workouts that would make some people run.
I am a woman that hit rock bottom and realized that I had to change who I was to feel beautiful, strong, and to make a difference for myself.
I am not saying get off your couch and go to the gym, I am not saying if you go to the gym you will find yourself. I am not saying that if you do what I do everything will be perfect. It is a day by day challenge. I still wake up in the morning and see the old me, the big girl who in her eyes is ugly and fat, but I force myself everyday to say one positive thing to myself.
I go to the gym so that after each workout I can say I did it ! I can say WOW the old you would have quit after the warm up. The new you completed the workout. I will continue to struggle everyday with the challenges of my weight but with each day that I go and each workout that I complete the struggle is smaller.
To the doubters, those men and women struggling with their weight, their confidence, and their perceptions of who they are…. Hang in there…. take it one day at a time… never let anyone tell you that you can’t… Don’t tell yourself that you can’t… Tell yourself everyday that you can.
If you decide that you want to go to the gym and you are nervous remember the hardest part is walking through the door. The easiest part is going and trying your best. Never give up no matter what. All those fit people you see in the gym one day that will be you. One day someone just like you will walk into the gym, look at you, and see what you saw when you first walked in.
If you are curious come out and try the 30 day boot camp. I can tell you this after 30 days you will want to keep coming back.
You will meet life long friends that will become not only a support team but a part of your family. They are all there to help you out and give you advice that will improve your technique and your skills.
Cat is a very special woman, it quickly becomes obvious within minutes of meeting her!
To say that I am proud of her would be an understatement. It’s not just in the transformation she has gone through. It’s watching her at Hostyle , how hard she works. It’s seeing her stop and talk to new members to make sure they feel welcomed.
Cat’s cool – she rocks and she knows the struggle is real.
Thx Cat, you make Hostyle a better place!
If you want to start your transformation – here are 2 ways
- Hostyle Testdrive – the 30 day bootcamp trial ==> CLICK HERE<==
- The Personal Training Kick Start – 3 sessions to begin your new awesomeness ==>CLICK HERE<==
Latest posts by Curd Hos (see all)
- This is when I hit rock bottom – Cat’s Story - January 31, 2017
- More exciting news at Hostyle… - January 30, 2017
- From Fat – Broke and an Alcoholic to building a Kickass Training Facility - November 22, 2016